Mainstream culture sometimes leads us to believe that those practising BDSM (bondage, discipline, dominance, submission and sadomasochism), and people in Sub / Dom relationships are seedy, dangerous and weird.
Fetishism was considered even a mental disorder by health professionals back in 2013.
BDSM and fetishes have been brought to the forefront due to film series like 50 Shades of Grey and popular crime dramas, and attitudes are shifting towards these kinky sexual endeavours.
It’s not just the physical feelings that one experiences whilst having fun with fetish dating. Research suggests that BDSM can offer some seriously healthy benefits too.
Improved Sub / Dom Relationships
A study on couple’s hormonal changes whilst practising BDSM found intimacy and connection benefits.
Dopamine, the feel-good chemical is released when couples engage in activities such as acting on fetishes.
These feelings are similar to what we experience when we start a new relationship. The butterflies in our tummies, the beaming smiles and blushing cheeks.
Better Mental Health
A study by International Society for Sexual Medicine discovered that those partaking in kinky sexual practises and in Sub / Dom relationships were not psychologically damaged! They were also generally more adjusted than those not into BDSM.
Not only that, but the kinky test group felt their relationships were more secure.
They felt their overall sense of well-being was increased and they were more confident and open.
Anxiety was decreased and they cared a lot less about what others thought.
Those in Sub / Dom relationships are more open to expressing their sexual desires and preferences.
They are also able to effectively state their boundaries.
These characteristics are indicative of a positive mental state, and extends to personal relationships in and out of the bedroom.
Kinksters generally experience increased overall happiness. What do you think about that!
A Reduction In Stress
It’s thought that those participating in BDSM can experience an altered state of consciousness. This is likened to those who use yoga to meditate, or like “runners high.”
All of these practises help to lower the stress hormone, Cortisol.
Interestingly, another study backs that statement up by showing dominant partners cortisol levels were decreased after a BDSM sesh.
Lower cortisol levels means protection from high blood pressure, low immunity and insulin resistance.
But How Do You Find Your Sub / Dom?
It’s all very well watching others enjoy BDSM on popular porn sites, but doing it in real life is another matter.
Since BDSM, fetishes and kinky sexual practises have become more ‘acceptable’ and mainstream, the online dating industry has created some niche dating sites. Sites like subs-and-doms.com make it easy to find likeminded people.
If you’re approaching new people on these sites, it’s very important to remember to remain safe. To make sure you don’t take the communication off the dating site in question.
You should also flag any behaviour you think is unacceptable.
With adult online dating sites, it’s always better to pay for a membership.
This will mean you’ll have the support of a moderation team. They make sure that you’re not getting targetted by scammers or being taken advantage of.
So, we’ve learned that practising BDSM and acting out fetishes is great for your mental health. It’s also an excellent way to improve your general well-being, your relationships and your confidence.
I wonder what Mr Grey is up to tonight? 😉